Seeing and being seen... [Archive] - Deep House Page Forums

i.be.me

08-25-2003, 10:40 AM

OK, here's the scenario...

It is a sunny afternoon, cumulus clouds, 84 degrees; I'm walking down the street in (modest) jean shorts and (full coverage) tank top. In the span of 1 1/2 hours the following things occurred:

1. pssstttttt
2. Hey, hey, rasta girl!
3. Yo, baby can I talk to you?
4. What's up beautiful?
5. honk honk honk
6. yo! yo! hey! excuse me...
7. long desiring stares
8. follow me on the same train car, sit opposite, stare
9. mmm, mmm, mmm
10. and a number of broken necks

So, here's what I want to know...

Have you ever done this? If yes, has it worked? Is it to meet someone you want to have a relationship with, score sex, or entertainment? How would you like the person to respond?

AND/OR

Has this ever happened to you? If yes, when and how often? Is it dependent on how you are dressed, time of day, location? How do you react to this behavior? Do you like it? Does it make you feel attractive? Is this how you met your partner?

Mack-Williams

08-25-2003, 10:44 AM

I want to see a pic. A full one, so I can say hey baby what yo number is? graemlins/grinyes.gif

i.be.me

08-25-2003, 10:48 AM

Originally posted by Mack-Williams:
I want to see a pic. A full one, so I can say hey baby what yo number is? graemlins/grinyes.gif get in line baby graemlins/tongueout.gif

Mack-Williams

08-25-2003, 10:49 AM

Originally posted by Saglady:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Mack-Williams:
I want to see a pic. A full one, so I can say hey baby what yo number is? graemlins/grinyes.gif get in line baby graemlins/tongueout.gif [/QUOTE]As long as I am first. ;)

[ August 25, 2003, 11:50 AM: Message edited by: Mack-Williams ]

And

08-25-2003, 10:59 AM

Originally posted by Saglady:
So, here's what I want to know...

Have you ever done this? If yes, has it worked? Is it to meet someone you want to have a relationship with, score sex, or entertainment? How would you like the person to respond?I have NEVER seriously done this. With friends and to friends as a joke but not how I go about it.

Originally posted by Saglady:
AND/OR

Has this ever happened to you? If yes, when and how often? Is it dependent on how you are dressed, time of day, location? How do you react to this behavior? Do you like it? Does it make you feel attractive? Is this how you met your partner?It happens off and on ... Lately, and this is kind of weird, I've noticed I've been getting "attention" on the road. The past few nights (early am 5-7ish) as I've been driving home,- I've had a few drivers signaling me to slow down or stop so they could talk to me (I can tell 'cause of the cheesers on their faces and the gestures indicating they want my phone #). One guy followed me for a few miles till I took an exit to avoid him. graemlins/scared.gif
-Don't think it's dependant on how I dress but on what the beholder is beholding when they look at me.
-I used to get a lot madder about it ... Now I just try to see it as "that's just him." graemlins/conf44.gif
-I'm more confused by these actions than anything. Liking it doesn't get a chance to get into the picture.

Originally posted by Saglady:
partnerThis past weekend reconfirmed in my mind who my true partner(s) is (are) ... graemlins/1luvu.gif
And hell no we didn't meet in the ways you describe. More along the lines of we met and just knew.

richierich

08-25-2003, 11:09 AM

Maybe not along those same lines but..if you wanna get to know someone I would think you'd need to approach/interact with them in some kinda way. I am playing for keeps now so If there is no reciprocated interest I'm out. I don't really approach a woman unless she has given me SOME kind of signal that it is ok for me to do so.

Ken1015

08-25-2003, 11:35 AM

Although I'm a man I have had it done to me by other men, albeit unintentionally. I have long hair. Whenever I rode my motorcycle I always wore a helmet and jacket. Men would often whistle and try to get my attention in various ways. I loved seeing the looks on their idiotic faces when I would lift my face shield but it got so annoying that I would avoid touristy areas like Rush St. and Ohio and Ontario Streets on the weekends.

It gave me more insight to some of the crap that women go through on an everyday basis. I got followed once too and that's really creepy. It also showed me how stupid men are because even with all my gear on I'd imagine a smart person would assume I was male. I'm 6 feet tall and 185 pounds and even with my helmet on you could still see the hair on my chin. Damn!

ultra

08-25-2003, 11:55 AM

That happens to me most of time, no matter what I'm wearing-sheer linen or sweater and jeans.

Lately for some reason, white men are checking me out. That's never happened to me.

It's a real turnoff when they make sounds with their mouths or say nasty, crass things. I appreciate a nice comment like "hey beautiful" and whatnot though.

I've seen it all-brothas following the cab I'm in to talk to me (yes, believe it), following me on the train, etc.

Men are something else! ;)

i.be.me

08-25-2003, 11:58 AM

Originally posted by Mack-Williams:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Saglady:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Mack-Williams:
I want to see a pic. A full one, so I can say hey baby what yo number is? graemlins/grinyes.gif get in line baby graemlins/tongueout.gif [/QUOTE]As long as I am first. ;) [/QUOTE]well, since you're being so cooperative, of course! graemlins/grinyes.gif

i.be.me

08-25-2003, 12:08 PM

Originally posted by ultra:
That happens to me most of time, no matter what I'm wearing-sheer linen or sweater and jeans.

Lately for some reason, white men are checking me out. That's never happened to me.

It's a real turnoff when they make sounds with their mouths or say nasty, crass things. I appreciate a nice comment like "hey beautiful" and whatnot though.

I've seen it all-brothas following the cab I'm in to talk to me (yes, believe it), following me on the train, etc.

Men are something else! ;) so... have you found creative ways to interrupt it or do you just ignore it?

I've tried to say different things, but most of the time i get "well you ain't all that" or "B!t$h", etc.

So, mostly I ignore it until I have had it and the next guy who tries to talk to me catches it. AR15firing.gif

There's gotta be a better way...

ultra

08-25-2003, 12:11 PM

If it's a crass comment, I make a smirk or snarl at them. They usually leave me alone after that. Once in a while I'll get a 'bitch' or something of that sort.

If I think they're cute, I giggle and whatnot. I get kinda shy though. If they speak first, I follow the convo, otherwise, bye bye baby.

mhd

08-25-2003, 12:20 PM

Originally posted by ultra:
If it's a crass comment, I make a smirk or snarl at them. They usually leave me alone after that. Once in a while I'll get a 'bitch' or something of that sort.

If I think they're cute, I giggle and whatnot. I get kinda shy though. If they speak first, I follow the convo, otherwise, bye bye baby. can you elaborate on what you mean by "speak first"? thanks

ultra

08-25-2003, 12:22 PM

"speak first" means they start the conversation, such as "Hey beautiful, how you doing today?" or something similar.

lola desire

08-25-2003, 12:25 PM

i have recently discoverd what it really is about the gawking and the cat calls that really vexes me.

it is not the stare alone, people use their eyes without me seeing them all the time.

it is not the cat call alone, i don't always hear everything people say about me.

what vexes me is this... the observer is quiet, perhaps staring, as i'm walking... stays quiet as i walk by. then BAM!!! as soon as they get to see the body part they were waiting to come by on the conveyor belt, THAT is the PRECISE moment they decide to speak... and from experience it is never the eyes.

i've decided that if they wanted to talk my breasts or my ass, the should not be surprised when my mouth doesn't answer.

yes, i have thought about pretending to answer with the body part. icon_rofl.gif

[ August 25, 2003, 01:28 PM: Message edited by: lola desire ]

JMJ

08-25-2003, 12:29 PM

Originally posted by Saglady:
OK, here's the scenario...

It is a sunny afternoon, cumulus clouds, 84 degrees; I'm walking down the street in (modest) jean shorts and (full coverage) tank top. In the span of 1 1/2 hours the following things occurred:

1. pssstttttt
2. Hey, hey, rasta girl!
3. Yo, baby can I talk to you?
4. What's up beautiful?
5. honk honk honk
6. yo! yo! hey! excuse me...
7. long desiring stares
8. follow me on the same train car, sit opposite, stare
9. mmm, mmm, mmm
10. and a number of broken necks

So, here's what I want to know...

Have you ever done this? If yes, has it worked? Is it to meet someone you want to have a relationship with, score sex, or entertainment? How would you like the person to respond?

AND/OR

Has this ever happened to you? If yes, when and how often? Is it dependent on how you are dressed, time of day, location? How do you react to this behavior? Do you like it? Does it make you feel attractive? Is this how you met your partner? This happens to me ALL the time. I'm tired of being referred to as "baby" and "rasta girl"......JMJ

richierich

08-25-2003, 12:32 PM

I hate to be the one to say it but men and women do and view some things differently. Some guys(this is generalization)will say the crass, rude comments and some will wine you and dine and be a perfect gentleman. In the end we still WANT THE BOOTY!!!!

lola desire

08-25-2003, 12:35 PM

Originally posted by richierich:
I hate to be the one to say it but men and women do and view some things differently. Some guys(this is generalization)will say the crass, rude comments and some will wine you and dine and be a perfect gentleman. In the end we still WANT THE BOOTY!!!! the point is you have to talk to a PERSON to get the booty. the problem is people forget about the person.

Mack-Williams

08-25-2003, 12:46 PM

Disses I have received

I only talk to tall guys.
My truck is bigger than yours (my roommate cussed this girl out) graemlins/rofl.gif
Girl keeps walking and gives me the hand.
Girl accepts my card. I get a call from my ex-wife. Girl is one of my ex-wifes friends. icon_rofl.gif

[ August 25, 2003, 01:47 PM: Message edited by: Mack-Williams ]

richierich

08-25-2003, 12:52 PM

Originally posted by lola desire:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by richierich:
I hate to be the one to say it but men and women do and view some things differently. Some guys(this is generalization)will say the crass, rude comments and some will wine you and dine and be a perfect gentleman. In the end we still WANT THE BOOTY!!!! the point is you have to talk to a PERSON to get the booty. the problem is people forget about the person. [/QUOTE]I'm being silly but with a message as well. THE BOOTY IS HYPNOTIC. IT MAKES US TOTALLY ZONE OUT AND LOSE FOCUS ON WHAT YOU ARE SAYING. You as a woman can make a man feel like he's the best thing since sliced bread or break him down and take his machismo totally way..WITH THE BOOTY!
I am not making this up your boy will leave you stranded at a party BECAUSE OF THE BOOTY. Your boy will lie on you BECAUSE OF THE BOOTY. People are locked up because someone else was GETTING THE BOOTY. I hear what you are saying..there is a person attached to the BOOTY that has feelings, emotions and the like. It may be insulting to a woman for a man to ONLY think about the BOOTY but if the booty doesn't have a brain or personality or passion or ideas about life then it's only a BOOTY and this is ENOUGH for some guys. We're just wired a little different again I an generalizing so what I say is not THE GOSPEL.

And

08-25-2003, 12:57 PM

Originally posted by Saglady:
I've tried to say different things, but most of the time i get "well you ain't all that" or "B!t$h", etc.

So, mostly I ignore it
There's gotta be a better way... Now this scenario I find a side splitter. What do you say to a guy after he hits you with that line after he hits on you.

Too much! icon_rofl.gif icon_rofl.gif

JMJ

08-25-2003, 01:00 PM

Mack-Williams

08-25-2003, 01:02 PM

Originally posted by JMJ:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by 6 23:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Saglady:
I've tried to say different things, but most of the time i get "well you ain't all that" or "B!t$h", etc.

So, mostly I ignore it
There's gotta be a better way... Now this scenario I find a side splitter. What do you say to a guy after he hits you with that line after he hits on you.

Too much! icon_rofl.gif icon_rofl.gif [/QUOTE]"And I was JUST ABOUT to give you the booty, too"........JMJ ;) [/QUOTE]I thought You didn't Butt Love JMJ.
graemlins/rofl.gif

And

08-25-2003, 01:04 PM

Originally posted by JMJ:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by 6 23:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Saglady:
I've tried to say different things, but most of the time i get "well you ain't all that" or "B!t$h", etc.

So, mostly I ignore it
There's gotta be a better way... Now this scenario I find a side splitter. What do you say to a guy after he hits you with that line after he hits on you.

Too much! icon_rofl.gif icon_rofl.gif [/QUOTE]"And I was JUST ABOUT to give you the booty, too"........JMJ ;) [/QUOTE]If I'd only known sooner ...
http://www.hwbrides.com.sg/HWBRIDES_0103_images_mis/HWB_MANNERS_images/cartoon_june.jpg

JMJ

08-25-2003, 01:06 PM

Originally posted by Mack-Williams:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by JMJ:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by 6 23:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Saglady:
I've tried to say different things, but most of the time i get "well you ain't all that" or "B!t$h", etc.

So, mostly I ignore it
There's gotta be a better way... Now this scenario I find a side splitter. What do you say to a guy after he hits you with that line after he hits on you.

Too much! icon_rofl.gif icon_rofl.gif [/QUOTE]"And I was JUST ABOUT to give you the booty, too"........JMJ ;) [/QUOTE]I thought You didn't Butt Love JMJ.
graemlins/rofl.gif [/QUOTE]Quit asking. The answer is no......JMJ

Mack-Williams

08-25-2003, 01:08 PM

Originally posted by JMJ:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Mack-Williams:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by JMJ:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by 6 23:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Saglady:
I've tried to say different things, but most of the time i get "well you ain't all that" or "B!t$h", etc.

So, mostly I ignore it
There's gotta be a better way... Now this scenario I find a side splitter. What do you say to a guy after he hits you with that line after he hits on you.

Too much! icon_rofl.gif icon_rofl.gif [/QUOTE]"And I was JUST ABOUT to give you the booty, too"........JMJ ;) [/QUOTE]I thought You didn't Butt Love JMJ.
graemlins/rofl.gif [/QUOTE]Quit asking. The answer is no......JMJ [/QUOTE]Seems like a yes to 6 23. What size dildo do you want her to use.

JMJ

08-25-2003, 01:09 PM

Originally posted by Mack-Williams:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by JMJ:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Mack-Williams:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by JMJ:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by 6 23:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Saglady:
I've tried to say different things, but most of the time i get "well you ain't all that" or "B!t$h", etc.

So, mostly I ignore it
There's gotta be a better way... Now this scenario I find a side splitter. What do you say to a guy after he hits you with that line after he hits on you.

Too much! icon_rofl.gif icon_rofl.gif [/QUOTE]"And I was JUST ABOUT to give you the booty, too"........JMJ ;) [/QUOTE]I thought You didn't Butt Love JMJ.
graemlins/rofl.gif [/QUOTE]Quit asking. The answer is no......JMJ [/QUOTE]Seems like a yes to 6 23. What size dildo do you want her to use. [/QUOTE]You are unfunny. Away with you. I only talk to tall guys......JMJ

i.be.me

08-25-2003, 01:38 PM

Originally posted by JMJ:
This happens to me ALL the time. I'm tired of being referred to as "baby" and "rasta girl"......JMJ Awah, you know I'll do you right baby. No one can say it like I can - it will be music to your ears when I say it. icon_rofl.gif

i.be.me

08-25-2003, 01:51 PM

Originally posted by 6 23:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Saglady:
I've tried to say different things, but most of the time i get "well you ain't all that" or "B!t$h", etc.

So, mostly I ignore it.
There's gotta be a better way... Now this scenario I find a side splitter. What do you say to a guy after he hits you with that line after he hits on you.

Too much! icon_rofl.gif icon_rofl.gif [/QUOTE]Yeah, it is so absurd! I can laugh now. Fool! graemlins/spanka.gif

But in the situation, doesn't feel so funny. Especailly if they've followed me around or tried to touch me.

Which brings me to a related point... this ia a primary reason for my bad attitude when I'm outside of my house.

I've also noticed that men (white & black) act like this toward women of color much more often than toward white women. What's up with that?

JMJ

08-25-2003, 01:53 PM

Originally posted by Saglady:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by JMJ:
This happens to me ALL the time. I'm tired of being referred to as "baby" and "rasta girl"......JMJ Awah, you know I'll do you right baby. No one can say it like I can - it will be music to your ears when I say it. icon_rofl.gif [/QUOTE]I'm naked and waiting.....JMJ

i.be.me

08-25-2003, 02:03 PM

Originally posted by JMJ:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Saglady:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by JMJ:
This happens to me ALL the time. I'm tired of being referred to as "baby" and "rasta girl"......JMJ Awah, you know I'll do you right baby. No one can say it like I can - it will be music to your ears when I say it. icon_rofl.gif [/QUOTE]I'm naked and waiting.....JMJ [/QUOTE]I want to see a pic. A full one... biggrinangel.gif

JMJ

08-25-2003, 02:08 PM

Originally posted by Saglady:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by JMJ:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Saglady:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by JMJ:
This happens to me ALL the time. I'm tired of being referred to as "baby" and "rasta girl"......JMJ Awah, you know I'll do you right baby. No one can say it like I can - it will be music to your ears when I say it. icon_rofl.gif [/QUOTE]I'm naked and waiting.....JMJ [/QUOTE]I want to see a pic. A full one... biggrinangel.gif [/QUOTE]How large is your monitor??......JMJ

i.be.me

08-25-2003, 03:21 PM

Originally posted by JMJ:

How large is your monitor??......JMJ icon_rofl.gif Big enough baby, and I have two of them (17" & 19"), so bring it on! And it looks like it is just me & you left on this thread, so why don't you just post it here? It's a long way from where I am to Chicago, so I need something to look forward to.

DD Licious

08-25-2003, 03:31 PM

graemlins/scared.gif

graemlins/bolt.gif

08-25-2003, 03:32 PM

ha ha....that beauty can be a curse cant it?.. :D

Good scenario as this sista I know has to deal with this.....I keep telling her, I'd have fun with it (try to make the brainless think, by that time you can be long gone while the hamster is running on that rickety spin-wheel)..... :D

Pathetic though, that's the less than animal type of stuff. Brothers dont know how to pass a compliment and keep stepping.....

Just have patience and know that they're passing you a compliment, no matter how neanderthalish it appears....

i.be.me

08-25-2003, 03:58 PM

Originally posted by Hk:
...I keep telling her, I'd have fun with it (try to make the brainless think, by that time you can be long gone while the hamster is running on that rickety spin-wheel)... :D

Just have patience and know that they're passing you a compliment, no matter how neanderthalish it appears... Thanks Hk - I'll start trying to have fun with it and share the successes. smile.gif

richierich

08-25-2003, 04:01 PM

How about this as a comlpiment "Baby you sho is pretty".

And

08-25-2003, 04:15 PM

Just here for JMJ's pics ...

http://deephousepage.com/smilies/eye_anim.gif http://deephousepage.com/smilies/eye_anim.gif

i.be.me

08-25-2003, 04:27 PM

Originally posted by richierich:
How about this as a comlpiment "Baby you sho is pretty". Not bad. Depends on how its delivered. If it is with a light tone and sincere - I'd smile and say thanks. graemlins/remybussi.gif

Use that one lately richierrich? :D

i.be.me

08-25-2003, 04:28 PM

Originally posted by 6 23:
Just here for JMJ's pics ...

http://deephousepage.com/smilies/eye_anim.gif http://deephousepage.com/smilies/eye_anim.gif Me too! I'm waiting darlin'...

JMJ

08-25-2003, 05:41 PM

Originally posted by 6 23:
Just here for JMJ's pics ...

http://deephousepage.com/smilies/eye_anim.gif http://deephousepage.com/smilies/eye_anim.gif YOU'VE already seen pictures, but I'm glad you came back for more.....JMJ graemlins/remybussi.gif

housebe4titties

08-25-2003, 06:39 PM

i think its irritating. especially when i'm standing on the street at the bus stop trying not to look so obvious. i hate it when they say "ay shawty!" i usually ignore em and give em the evil eye.
if its a guy who is nice, but just looks busted then i tell him "sorry don't feel like talkin to anyone right now. holla!"
quick and to the point.

but i hate those men who think they can just grab you like they own you. mad1.gif

And

08-25-2003, 06:52 PM

Originally posted by JMJ:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by 6 23:
Just here for JMJ's pics ...

http://deephousepage.com/smilies/eye_anim.gif http://deephousepage.com/smilies/eye_anim.gif YOU'VE already seen pictures, but I'm glad you came back for more.....JMJ graemlins/remybussi.gif [/QUOTE]You know admissions like this make it really hard on the macking game I got going on here on the DHP ... Next time say it in a pm ... along with pictures of course, I mean .. er ... Now post those pics! graemlins/cool_shades.gif

So easy a protic can do it (QUAD)

08-25-2003, 06:57 PM

Originally posted by ultra:
If it's a crass comment, I make a smirk or snarl at them. They usually leave me alone after that. Once in a while I'll get a 'bitch' or something of that sort.

If I think they're cute, I giggle and whatnot. I get kinda shy though. If they speak first, I follow the convo, otherwise, bye bye baby. WOULD YA BE MAD IF I SPOKE TO YA ON THE TRAIN??? :D :D

ultra

08-25-2003, 08:13 PM

I don't take the train baby! graemlins/tongueout.gif

Originally posted by DJ QUAD:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by ultra:
If it's a crass comment, I make a smirk or snarl at them. They usually leave me alone after that. Once in a while I'll get a 'bitch' or something of that sort.

If I think they're cute, I giggle and whatnot. I get kinda shy though. If they speak first, I follow the convo, otherwise, bye bye baby. WOULD YA BE MAD IF I SPOKE TO YA ON THE TRAIN??? :D :D [/QUOTE]

BHouse

08-25-2003, 09:41 PM

Originally posted by Ken1015:
Although I'm a man I have had it done to me by other men, albeit unintentionally. I have long hair. Whenever I rode my motorcycle I always wore a helmet and jacket. Men would often whistle and try to get my attention in various ways. I loved seeing the looks on their idiotic faces when I would lift my face shield but it got so annoying that I would avoid touristy areas like Rush St. and Ohio and Ontario Streets on the weekends.

It gave me more insight to some of the crap that women go through on an everyday basis. I got followed once too and that's really creepy. It also showed me how stupid men are because even with all my gear on I'd imagine a smart person would assume I was male. I'm 6 feet tall and 185 pounds and even with my helmet on you could still see the hair on my chin. Damn! icon_rofl.gif icon_rofl.gif icon_rofl.gif This is hilarious.....Personally, I have never been able to pull off saying things like that. Now I have buddies that it works for... Some women like that type of attention and those very same women are not attractive to me so therefore I never meet or speak to them on that level...

[ August 25, 2003, 10:43 PM: Message edited by: BHouse ]

i.be.me

08-26-2003, 07:45 AM

Originally posted by BHouse:
Some women like that type of attention and those very same women are not attractive to me so therefore I never meet or speak to them on that level... This is what I was afraid of... I guess it is like telemarketing. Most people hate it, but it works enough of the time so that businesses still use it as a strategy.

Makes me sad to think that very reason some women like it is because they are treated poorly b/c folk think they are ugly or feel unattractive often enough, so any attention in whatever form is welcome. Maybe if they were constantly bombarded with it, they would feel differently about it.

Who is beautiful and why is so made up. I need a drink. graemlins/all_coholic.gif