Have you ever been called downstairs from the upstairs of the back of the house

[Dee-Dee Sheridan]

or from the front of the house to get the remote, change the
channel, turn off the light, or fix her a glass of ice water?

2. Have you ever been hit with an extension cord, a switch, or the nearest
shoe?

3. Have you ever had to pick your own switch off the tree and she sent you
back because the one you picked was too little?

4. Have you ever been burned on your ear with a straightening comb?

5. Have you ever been hit in the head or knuckles with a comb or hairbrush?

6. Have you ever been told to "Shut Up or I'll give you something to cry
about while she beats you with a belt--pronouncing every syllable---"Did-n't---I---tell---you---not---to---do---that---no----more?!"

7. Your ponytails were so tight, you got those little bumps around your scalp.

8. The white people in the school office (principal, secretary, etc.) were afraid of her.

9. You were never "grounded"--just got whoopins right out the shower.

10. Alcohol, peroxide, cocoa butter, and Vaseline were the main items in the bathroom cabinet.

11. You were scared to go home when you had a bad report card.

12. She made you participate in every church activity (choir, Jr. Usher Board, Easter play, Christmas play, etc.)

13. Has she ever come inside and picked you up from a school dance in hair
rollers and her gown or pajamas on under her coat.

14. Have you ever been pinched for going to sleep in church?

15. When you ask her for something, her response is..."You got a job?"

16. Have you ever been beaten for something your brother or sister did, just because you were around?

17. She vacuums everyday just so the carpet can have lines in it.

18. Have you ever been told to turn off the TV, get off the phone, or sit
down and be quiet when its storming outside because the Lord was doing his
work.

19. Friends, family and friends of the family try to keep you out of trouble because they know your mother and how she is.

20. You were afraid to call the child abuse hotline.

21. She has to pray to God..."Lord, please don't let me hurt this child!!!" before she gives you a whipping.

If you can relate to any of these things, then you know that YOUR MOTHER WAS A BEAUTIFUL BLACK WOMAN, THAT DIDN'T TAKE NO MESS WHEN YOU WERE GROWING UP!!!"

GOD BLESS OUR BEAUTIFUL BLACK MOTHERS and grandmothers, too!!

[ September 29, 2003, 12:27 PM: Message edited by: Dee-Dee Sheridan ]

['Magic' Juan]

I can relate to some of these things .. but, surprisingly, my mom is not Black!

magic_juan :rolleyes:

[jsd540]

Originally posted by Magic Juan:
I can relate to some of these things .. but, surprisingly, my mom is not Black!

magic_juan :rolleyes: icon_rofl.gif icon_rofl.gif

I wash thinkin' the same thing...

[lola desire]

perhaps this one is in bad taste, but i figured someone could relate...

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

You Know You A Ghetto Christian If...

1) You lie on an application to get a job and then get up and testify that "God made a way out of no way!"

2) You get mad at a visitor and call them out for sitting in YOUR seat.

3) You tell the preacher to baptize you from the neck down because you just got your hair did!

4) You take 2 hours to get ready for church, get there late, and leave early!!

5) You open your Bible and you cough from the dust that flies out.

6) Your wedding song is 'Secret Lovers'.

7) You do not lift your hand during worship because your acrylic nail is broken.

8) The only time you like to sing in the choir is when they let you sing "your" song.

9) You do not tithe because you say, "the preacher might be crooked and stealing the Lord'#######, so I don't want to give it to him."

10) After you've done wrong and someone has rebuked you, you don't repent but you say, "Well the Lord knows my heart".

11) If you have ever said, "show me in the Bible where it says, thou shall not smoke".

12) Your favorite part of the service is the benediction.

13) You buy "hot" merchandise and testify the Lord blessed me with a TV,jewelry, clothes, etc.

14)You overheard someone say, "We got fed today at service" and you asked if they served chicken.

15) You just got finished smoking on the outside of the church and then try to lead a song, get choked up, holding your throat and say to the congregation, "The devil don't want me to sing this song."

[DJJM3.COM]

Dee Dee- I can relate.............

[kara]

Originally posted by jsd540:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Magic Juan:
I can relate to some of these things .. but, surprisingly, my mom is not Black!

magic_juan :rolleyes: icon_rofl.gif icon_rofl.gif

I wash thinkin' the same thing... </font>[/QUOTE]ditto ... my mom (whos white) made all the white women in the office afraid too ... she skurry when she mad

anything minus the ones mentioning the lord (insert "your grandparents would think or feel..." for most of those though)

[ September 29, 2003, 02:28 PM: Message edited by: kara ]

[DJ Rated M]

word on #3, Dee Dee.......

i remember that all too well......

[Dee-Dee Sheridan]

Originally posted by DJ Rated M:
word on #3, Dee Dee.......

i remember that all too well...... momma would bring back the whole tree

[Dee-Dee Sheridan]

That's ashame when you have to go get a switch to whoop yo own ass icon_rofl.gif

[DJ Rated M]

Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by DJ Rated M:
word on #3, Dee Dee.......

i remember that all too well...... momma would bring back the whole tree </font>[/QUOTE]you just had to get those thin switches and get your ass-whoopin over with....LOL

i couldn't get the thick ones or i was going back outside to get another one.....

and after it was over, if you was still cryin the parents always hit you with: "shut it up or i'll give you something else to cry about!!".....LOL

[ September 29, 2003, 03:00 PM: Message edited by: DJ Rated M ]

[Jamie 3:26]

Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
That's ashame when you have to go get a switch to whoop yo own ass icon_rofl.gif When my grandfather told me to do that,I looked at him like he was crazy.I didn't know what a damn switch was.I sure as hell found out. graemlins/spanka.gif

[DJ Rated M]

how about back then if you act up then your friend's parents had permisson to beat you as well........LOL

[Dee-Dee Sheridan]

Originally posted by DJ Rated M:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by DJ Rated M:
word on #3, Dee Dee.......

i remember that all too well...... momma would bring back the whole tree </font>[/QUOTE]you just had to get those thin switches and get your ass-whoopin over with....LOL

i couldn't get the thick ones or i was going back outside to get another one.....

and after it was over, if you was still cryin the parents always hit you with: "shut it up or i'll give you something else to cry about!!".....LOL </font>[/QUOTE]Hahahahaha icon_rofl.gif

[Dee-Dee Sheridan]

Originally posted by JAMIE 3:26:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
That's ashame when you have to go get a switch to whoop yo own ass icon_rofl.gif When my grandfather told me to do that,I looked at him like he was crazy.I didn't know what a damn switch was.I sure as hell found out. graemlins/spanka.gif </font>[/QUOTE]Did he bring back the tree? icon_rofl.gif

[Jamie 3:26]

Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by JAMIE 3:26:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
That's ashame when you have to go get a switch to whoop yo own ass icon_rofl.gif When my grandfather told me to do that,I looked at him like he was crazy.I didn't know what a damn switch was.I sure as hell found out. graemlins/spanka.gif </font>[/QUOTE]Did he bring back the tree? icon_rofl.gif </font>[/QUOTE]Naw.I got a switch.It was thin,so he beat me with that one,cause it was small.He went out and got one.When I saw that big ass branch,I was hollerin'.He was picking the leaves of talking to me.Then said he loved me and whopped the fire off of my ass.

[Dee-Dee Sheridan]

Originally posted by JAMIE 3:26:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by JAMIE 3:26:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
That's ashame when you have to go get a switch to whoop yo own ass icon_rofl.gif When my grandfather told me to do that,I looked at him like he was crazy.I didn't know what a damn switch was.I sure as hell found out. graemlins/spanka.gif </font>[/QUOTE]Did he bring back the tree? icon_rofl.gif </font>[/QUOTE]Naw.I got a switch.It was thin,so he beat me with that one,cause it was small.He went out and got one.When I saw that big ass branch,I was hollerin'.He was picking the leaves of talking to me.Then said he loved me and whopped the fire off of my ass. </font>[/QUOTE]You know I beat cha cause I love ya, now come on let's go find ya other eye. icon_rofl.gif

[Jamie 3:26]

That's some sick ass psycology ain't it??I will not beat my children,when I have them,unless they really mess up.I do believe in spanking,not beatdowns.There's a difference.

I know I ain't gonna be no "Time-out" parent.

[Dee-Dee Sheridan]

What trips me out is seeing kids cuss out there parents or throwing temper tantrums. Betty Hatcher wasn't having it.

[Jamie 3:26]

Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
What trips me out is seeing kids cuss out there parents or throwing temper tantrums. Betty Hatcher wasn't having it. Not on my mother.Man,I would get the look and that was enough.If I even said dang,I got popped in the mouth.

[Dee-Dee Sheridan]

Originally posted by JAMIE 3:26:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
What trips me out is seeing kids cuss out there parents or throwing temper tantrums. Betty Hatcher wasn't having it. Not on my mother.Man,I would get the look and that was enough.If I even said dang,I got popped in the mouth. </font>[/QUOTE]http://deephousepage.com/smilies/eye_anim.gif http://deephousepage.com/smilies/eye_anim.gif

[DJ Rated M]

Originally posted by JAMIE 3:26:
That's some sick ass psycology ain't it??I will not beat my children,when I have them,unless they really mess up.I do believe in spanking,not beatdowns.There's a difference.

I know I ain't gonna be no "Time-out" parent. the way kids act now a dayz........they need REAL old school ass-whoopins like we got.....


wasn't any thoughts on calling Deyfuss(sp?)back then but now......oh well.....