Q: WHAT SHOULD YOU DO IF YOU SEE YOUR EX-HUSBAND ROLLING AROUND ON THE GROUND?

[Dee-Dee Sheridan]

A: Shoot him again.
>>
>>Q: How can you tell when a man is well-hung?
>>A: When you can just barely slip your finger in between his neck and
>>the noose.
>>
>>Q: Why do little boys whine?
>>A: Because they're practicing to be men.
>>
>>Q: How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
>>A: One - he just holds it up there and waits for the world to
>>revolve around him.
>>OR Three -- one to screw in the bulb, and two to listen to him
>>brag about
>>the screwing part.
>>
>>Q: What do you call a handcuffed man?
>>A: Trustworthy.
>>
>>Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath
>>and
>>calling your name?
>>A: You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.
>>
>>Q: Why does it take 100,000,000 sperm to fertilize one egg?
>>A: Because not one will stop and ask directions.
>>
>>Q: Why do female black widow spiders kill their males after
>>mating?
>>A: To stop the snoring before it starts.
>>
>>Q: Why do men whistle when they're sitting on the toilet?
>>A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe.
>>
>>Q: What is the difference between men and women.
>>A: A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need. A man wants
>>every
>>woman to satisfy his one need.
>>
>>Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
>>A: Rename the mail folder to "Instruction Manuals"
>>

[ June 25, 2003, 01:35 PM: Message edited by: Dee-Dee Sheridan ]

[Jamie 3:26]

Corny,like how Yo Momma's feet smell.

[Dee-Dee Sheridan]

Originally posted by JAMIE 3:26:
Corny,like how Yo Momma's feet smell. Shut up Al Grits Green, it's my birthday so I'm gone give yo bald headed momma some slack today. Tomorrow I'll be talking about her gold diggin ass again. graemlins/tongueout.gif

[Sharp Eye Washington]

graemlins/puke.gif

[Dee-Dee Sheridan]

Truth hurts huh ;)

[Alanda Marquette from DiscoLadyLand]

graemlins/spanka.gif Bad Dee Dee but funny graemlins/rofl.gif

[Moksha]

:D :D icon_rofl.gif

some of the best man jokes i've ever seen

[Moksha]

next to Lennox, that is.

[drilla]

Originally posted by Orion:
next to Lennox, that is. tell them the woman jokes about the makeup...

or better yet...tell em the clown jokes that pat likes so much...hahahahaha...remember that...hahahaha...

oh damn.

happy birthday dee dee...sorry about your moms. smile.gif

[Dee-Dee Sheridan]

Originally posted by matthew j:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Orion:
next to Lennox, that is. tell them the woman jokes about the makeup...

or better yet...tell em the clown jokes that pat likes so much...hahahahaha...remember that...hahahaha...

oh damn.

happy birthday dee dee...sorry about your moms. smile.gif </font>[/QUOTE]What about my mother?

[Moksha]

Originally posted by JAMIE 3:26:
Yo Momma's feet smell.

[Jamie 3:26]

Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by matthew j:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Orion:
next to Lennox, that is. tell them the woman jokes about the makeup...

or better yet...tell em the clown jokes that pat likes so much...hahahahaha...remember that...hahahaha...

oh damn.

happy birthday dee dee...sorry about your moms. smile.gif </font>[/QUOTE]What about my mother? </font>[/QUOTE]Everybody knows she got laid off from the plant.She worked at the steel mill chewing steel and spittin' out nuts and bolts.

[Dee-Dee Sheridan]

Stop highjacking my thread grits graemlins/spanka.gif Don't make have to come after you.

[drilla]

Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
Stop highjacking my thread grits graemlins/spanka.gif Don't make have to come after you. yeah..what he said.

hahaha...im on the ground crying...

hahahah@the plant...oh damn.

you guys are hilarious.

[Dee-Dee Sheridan]

Originally posted by matthew j:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
Stop highjacking my thread grits graemlins/spanka.gif Don't make have to come after you. yeah..what he said.

hahaha...im on the ground crying...

hahahah@the plant...oh damn.

you guys are hilarious. </font>[/QUOTE]Matthew don't let me have to get on yo momma, everybody else has.

[drilla]

Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by matthew j:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
Stop highjacking my thread grits graemlins/spanka.gif Don't make have to come after you. yeah..what he said.

hahaha...im on the ground crying...

hahahah@the plant...oh damn.

you guys are hilarious. </font>[/QUOTE]Matthew don't let me have to get on yo momma, everybody else has. </font>[/QUOTE]im not even gonna front...i cant hang...

but, i did hear that last fall someone told your mom it was chilly out...she ran outside with a bowl and a spoon.

[Sweetiwluv]

I don't know you but I love you man!!!
I look forward to reading your jokes. Forget the haters.

Happy Birthday Sunshine!!

graemlins/thumbsup.gif

[Dee-Dee Sheridan]

Originally posted by matthew j:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by matthew j:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
Stop highjacking my thread grits graemlins/spanka.gif Don't make have to come after you. yeah..what he said.

hahaha...im on the ground crying...

hahahah@the plant...oh damn.

you guys are hilarious. </font>[/QUOTE]Matthew don't let me have to get on yo momma, everybody else has. </font>[/QUOTE]im not even gonna front...i cant hang...

but, i did hear that last fall someone told your mom it was chilly out...she ran outside with a bowl and a spoon. </font>[/QUOTE]Matthew we do free style not repeats.

[drilla]

Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by matthew j:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by matthew j:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
Stop highjacking my thread grits graemlins/spanka.gif Don't make have to come after you. yeah..what he said.

hahaha...im on the ground crying...

hahahah@the plant...oh damn.

you guys are hilarious. </font>[/QUOTE]Matthew don't let me have to get on yo momma, everybody else has. </font>[/QUOTE]im not even gonna front...i cant hang...

but, i did hear that last fall someone told your mom it was chilly out...she ran outside with a bowl and a spoon. </font>[/QUOTE]Matthew we do free style not repeats. </font>[/QUOTE]"free style"...is that kinda like the amount your mom charges?

[Dee-Dee Sheridan]

Originally posted by Sweetiwluv:
I don't know you but I love you man!!!
I look forward to reading your jokes. Forget the haters.

Happy Birthday Sunshine!!

graemlins/thumbsup.gif ;)

[Dee-Dee Sheridan]

Originally posted by matthew j:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by matthew j:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by matthew j:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
Stop highjacking my thread grits graemlins/spanka.gif Don't make have to come after you. yeah..what he said.

hahaha...im on the ground crying...

hahahah@the plant...oh damn.

you guys are hilarious. </font>[/QUOTE]Matthew don't let me have to get on yo momma, everybody else has. </font>[/QUOTE]im not even gonna front...i cant hang...

but, i did hear that last fall someone told your mom it was chilly out...she ran outside with a bowl and a spoon. </font>[/QUOTE]Matthew we do free style not repeats. </font>[/QUOTE]"free style"...is that kinda like the amount your mom charges? </font>[/QUOTE]If it's "free style" how can she charge? :eek:

[drilla]

touche.

...i will be back

[DJ OPM]

Oh HELL naw. @ the plant.... That was off the chain.

[DJ OPM]

Women jokes to even the score....

Yesterday scientists in Canada revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones. To prove their theory they fed 100 men 12 pints of beer and observed that 100% of them started talking nonsense and couldn't drive.

If your wife and a lawyer were drowning and you had to choose...
Would you go to lunch or to a movie?


What is the cleverest thing to come out of a woman's mouth?
Einstein's penis.

What is the best thing about a blow job?
Ten minutes silence

Why do women sky-divers wear tampons?
So thay don't whistle on the way down.

Why did the woman cross the road?
Who care's, what's she doing out of the kitchen anyway.

Why do they name hurricanes after women?
When thay come it's warm and wet-when they go thay take your
house and car with them.

What's the difference between your wife and your job?
Your job still sucks after five years.

Why is a woman like a laxetive?
Becauce thay both irritate the $hit out of you.

What's the differance between your cock and your pay-check?
You don't have to beg a women to blow your pay-check.

Why did god create man first?
Because he did't want a woman looking over his sholder
criticising.

Why do women rub there eyes when thay wake up in the morning?
'Cause thay don't have any balls to scratch.

What do you tell a woman with 2 black eyes?
Nothing, you told her twice already.

All in good fun people.

OPM

[Moksha]

Originally posted by DJ OPM:

What do you tell a woman with 2 black eyes?
Nothing, you told her twice already.
graemlins/nono.gif graemlins/jpshakehead.gif

[Dee-Dee Sheridan]

Originally posted by DJ OPM:
What do you tell a woman with 2 black eyes?
Nothing, you told her twice already.OPM Actually this one is pretty funny! icon_rofl.gif

[SuzanneT]

To DeeDee and OPM:

You 2 have made my day
icon_rofl.gif

[And]

Originally posted by DJ OPM:
Women jokes to even the score....

Yesterday scientists in Canada revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones. To prove their theory they fed 100 men 12 pints of beer and observed that 100% of them started talking nonsense and couldn't drive.

If your wife and a lawyer were drowning and you had to choose...
Would you go to lunch or to a movie?


What is the cleverest thing to come out of a woman's mouth?
Einstein's penis.

What is the best thing about a blow job?
Ten minutes silence

Why do women sky-divers wear tampons?
So thay don't whistle on the way down.

Why did the woman cross the road?
Who care's, what's she doing out of the kitchen anyway.

Why do they name hurricanes after women?
When thay come it's warm and wet-when they go thay take your
house and car with them.

What's the difference between your wife and your job?
Your job still sucks after five years.

Why is a woman like a laxetive?
Becauce thay both irritate the $hit out of you.

What's the differance between your cock and your pay-check?
You don't have to beg a women to blow your pay-check.

Why did god create man first?
Because he did't want a woman looking over his sholder
criticising.

Why do women rub there eyes when thay wake up in the morning?
'Cause thay don't have any balls to scratch.

What do you tell a woman with 2 black eyes?
Nothing, you told her twice already.

All in good fun people.

OPM http://deephousepage.com/smilies/faint.gif

[Hk]

Dont know, but just spoke with my ex ridding a bike down the M-trail......

Oh shit, someone help me....please, oh-heavens my please....sheeez a brute maniac, pretty as fck!, the slice is real good but ahhhh, I need heeeeeelp, B 4 she has me getting caught up!.....

Gleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeennnnnnn, Heeeeeeeelp!

[DOTSmusic]

i'm dyin over here.
opm's list was hilarious as all hell.

[stee-lo]

Originally posted by Hk:
Dont know, but just spoke with my ex ridding a bike down the M-trail......

Oh shit, someone help me....please, oh-heavens my please....sheeez a brute maniac, pretty as fck!, the slice is real good but ahhhh, I need heeeeeelp, B 4 she has me getting caught up!.....

Gleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeennnnnnn, Heeeeeeeelp!
What in the hell is brother Hk talking about? Dont try and act like you understand what he **** he's posting. :D

Peace

[stee-lo]

What the **** he's posting. My bad.

Peace