They were married for 10 years...

[TAC]

come to find out, the mother f*cker is GAY! Nothing bad about that, but why the f*ck must some people drag others through their b*llsh*t. There are two boys involved, plus a wife. House, bills everything. This kid has been living a lie with this woman for the last TEN YEARS!!!

The screwed up thing about it is, this a*sshole was sleeping with men then coming home to his wife.

If your gonna be a man, then stand up, be counted, and do right by your family. Sexuality has nothing to do with this sh*t. These DL brothers are a pariah on the Black community.

If there are holes in what I’m saying, I will be here to defend my position with clarification or retractions.


Be a MAN for Christ sakes.

TAC

[And]

A liar and an adulterer graemlins/jpshakehead.gif

[Bold Soul]

As intolerant as the Black community is toward homosexuality, the streets must be lined with stories such as these.

Then again, that's slave Christianity for you.

[Leslie]

Originally posted by TAC:
These DL brothers are a pariah on the Black community.


Be a MAN for Christ sakes.

TAC PREACH!

[fred da warrior]

Originally posted by Danny Gardner:
As intolerant as the Black community is toward homosexuality, the streets must be lined with stories such as these.

Then again, that's slave Christianity for you. Man, don't start no shit.... graemlins/rofl.gif

[DJ RON C]

yeah, gay or straight, the responsibilities that you create by the roads you choose in life have to be taken care of no matter what.

Just because it took you that long to come to grips with your sexuality and face the true you, doesn't mean the children you brought into this world should suffer. graemlins/cool_shades.gif

[Bold Soul]

Originally posted by fred:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Danny Gardner:
As intolerant as the Black community is toward homosexuality, the streets must be lined with stories such as these.

Then again, that's slave Christianity for you. Man, don't start no shit.... graemlins/rofl.gif </font>[/QUOTE]Who, me?

[DLow]

That's fvcked up. I feel bad for dude's wife and kids; how does his wife explain that to the children? graemlins/jpshakehead.gif

[TAC]

Yo this sh*t burns me, bad. They haves two sons. The oldest one was born prematurely, and needs special education to keep him developing normally. The other boy is lovely too. And in the face of all this, you have this idiot pulling some crap like this.

These kids play with my daughter, they attend the same birthday parties, and stuff. WTF?

FWIW, dude has always known he was gay. The wife confronted him on that sh*t, and he admitted it. So, if she had not confronted him, he would have continued the charade for God knows how long. Perhaps, until he gave her AIDS, uh?

[TAC]

Originally posted by Derrick:
how does his wife explain that to the children?Right here is the crux. The oldest son is already exhibiting behavioral problems.

[JMJ]

Please read this:

http://www.suntimes.com/output/lifestyles/cst-nws-insight04.html

Extremely relevent to this topic. These guys have sex with guys but claim not to be gay??? Please stop with the denial.......JMJ

[ December 16, 2003, 12:11 PM: Message edited by: JMJ ]

[TAC]

Originally posted by JMJ:
Please read this:

http://www.suntimes.com/output/lifestyles/cst-nws-insight04.html

Extremely relevent to this topic. These guys have sex with guys but claim not to be gay??? Please stop with the denial.......JMJ Right on point. But may I add, gay or not, the point, which this article zero's in on, is that these guys are living secret lives that have deadly consequences.

P.S., he NY time also had a similar story that ran; no links, sorry.

[darrow]

Originally posted by Danny Gardner:
As intolerant as the Black community is toward homosexuality, the streets must be lined with stories such as these.

Then again, that's slave Christianity for you. It's not just the Black community though. There are men and families from all walks of life going through this and similar situations.

[Bold Soul]

Originally posted by darrow:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Danny Gardner:
As intolerant as the Black community is toward homosexuality, the streets must be lined with stories such as these.

Then again, that's slave Christianity for you. It's not just the Black community though. There are men and families from all walks of life going through this and similar situations. </font>[/QUOTE]Indeed...and it's harmful to say the least. You have major entertainment industry and political players with all the riches in the world that viciously protect their "secret", complete with cover marriages, adopted children and hostile lawyers that crush those who find it their business to violently "out" them.

I've lost some loved ones to homophobia. I'm not passing judgement on TAC's friend. I'm passing judgement on a society that insists on shackling its citizenry to false ideals of sexuality.

[Fletch]

This situation is more of a reason to really think about things BEFORE you walk down that isle with someone. While not defending the actions, I wonder what made him marry:

1) Thought at the time he was straight?
2) Thought he really loved her?
3) Family/parental pressures to marry (trust me, I know many situations like this).

[TAC]

Originally posted by Danny Gardner:
I've lost some loved ones to homophobia. I'm not passing judgement on TAC's friend. I'm passing judgement on a society that insists on shackling its citizenry to false ideals of sexuality. Your last point is a good one. Society places such a stigma on these individuals that they believe they must live liek this. Its sad.

Truth is, he'll always be my friend...

[MYOR]

Until its ok to be openly gay.. this will continue to happen.. especially in latin and black macho society..

[Bold Soul]

Originally posted by MYOR:
Until its ok to be openly gay.. this will continue to happen.. especially in latin and black macho society.. Agreed wholeheartedly.

[mhd]

there is a cat in canada who had aids, was bisexual, very promiscuous, killed himself, after, posting a list of all the people, men and women that he slept with and potentially infected

[Dolemite73]

I feel what you are saying Danny. Truly I do. But its wrong for a guy to do this to his wife. Can you agree with that?

[TAC]

Originally posted by Dolemite73:
I feel what you are saying Danny. Truly I do. But its wrong for a guy to do this to his wife. Can you agree with that? Yea, lets cut through all the b*llsh*t and get down to what is simply "right vs. wrong."

[The Buddy Love Show]

Originally posted by MYOR:
Until its ok to be openly gay.. this will continue to happen.. especially in latin and black macho society.. serious question...how much more open is open

[TAC]

Originally posted by St Magus the Reviled:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by MYOR:
Until its ok to be openly gay.. this will continue to happen.. especially in latin and black macho society.. serious question...how much more open is open </font>[/QUOTE]National policy has to be implicated in order to asnwer this question.

[TonyB]

TAC,

That is so fVcked up! This leading of a double
life by men is an afront to marriage and/or committed relationship. Men who try to cover up their homosexuality by marrying women and having kids are indeed a sorry lot and also do serious damage to our community. I have nothing but respect for men, both homosexual and heterosexual who know exactly who they are and do not try to perpetrate for the sake of their 'precious' reputation. If you're a 'dog' and just love the conquest of a fresh string of 'new p_ _ _y, then don't go telling some unsuspecting young lady that you love her for the sake of getting in her panties. Hell, she may even be down with your 'player, player' mentality. The fact of the matter is, once she knows 'who' you are, at least she can make a choice as to whether or not she can hang with you. Stand up and be proud of who you are. You cannot live your life to please others. To try and do so will only cause pain in the long run (as witnessed by the actions of the guy mentioned in this post).

The actions of your boy (or your girls husband) are reprehensible. He has screwed up the lives of three people. He has possibly put his wifes' health in jeopardy, just to satisfy his own desires. Neither she, nor her kids derserve that. She is going to truly have trust issues with men in the future.

My youngest sister is lesbian. The best thing she could have done for herself was to come clean about her sexuality. Even though my mom is 'old school' and not totally comfortable with the 'openess of affection displayed among those who lead alternative lifestyles', she still loves and accepts her daughter and her daughters' choice of lifestyle. This is where it needs to start --- in the home. When a child can't be comfortable with whom they are with family, it probably makes it even more difficult to open up to society in general. No one should be chastised for living their lives outside of the 'norm'.

'Real men' are comfortable in their own skin --- be they homo or heterosexual. They tend to be the happiest too. They don't need societys' approval as to how to live their lives, and they don't go around destroying the lives of others by leading double lives.

I have nothing but respect for those who embrace who they are and don't make any bones about it. To judge someone on their sexuality, instead of their character, is wrong. You may be missing out on a wonderful relationship by your closed-mindedness.

Too bad your boy didn't operate on the credo "To thine ownself, be true". He could have saved himself a lot of heart-ache by accepting his attraction to men and not involving some poor, unsuspecting woman in his cover-up. Shame on him.

[Leslie]

Does the "open" gay community confront this behaviour or do they just turn their heads? I ahve only seen articles written from the heterosexual position - what is being said on the other side.

JMJ - agreed about the issue of denial - ENOUGH!

[Bold Soul]

Originally posted by TAC:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Dolemite73:
I feel what you are saying Danny. Truly I do. But its wrong for a guy to do this to his wife. Can you agree with that? Yea, lets cut through all the b*llsh*t and get down to what is simply "right vs. wrong." </font>[/QUOTE]Fuck that "holier than thou" bullshit. You all can deal with the EFFECTS. I like looking at the CAUSES, and the causes here are the effects of a society that chooses to INSTITUTIONALLY SHUN other human beings via illusions of propriety.

Riddle me this, Batman...

Why is it only after homosexuals have taken their place among the breeder contingent of society has the United States started to seriously examine the issues of gay marriage and equal rights in full view of the public, hm?

[ December 16, 2003, 01:20 PM: Message edited by: Danny Gardner ]

[Bold Soul]

I'll put it another way...

How come FAGGOTS and DYKES have to MAKE BABIES, TAKE ON SHARED DEBT, join the PTA and become a CONSUMER BASE before the fat fucks in suits decided to allow them to be HUMAN BEINGS in the eyes of the law?

[Wild i]

Originally posted by Leslie:
Does the "open" gay community confront this behaviour or do they just turn their heads? I ahve only seen articles written from the heterosexual position - what is being said on the other side.

JMJ - agreed about the issue of denial - ENOUGH! Just as in the hetero world, some accept it, some don't. Most I know don't really accept the double life, but still understand why it happens. That glass ceiling can be mighty low, especially for a black gay male. Think about it:
Black = not worth much in the eyes of corp America
Gay = not worth much in the eyes of corp America

Which totally negates the male thing.

I beg again, as I do each time the subject comes up here, please do not equate being gay or bisexual with AIDS. One has little enough to do with the other. The real tragedy here is that this man made vows that he broke. A cheater's a cheater, no matter who he cheats with.

[liL Ray]

Originally posted by TAC:
come to find out, the mother f*cker is GAY! Nothing bad about that, but why the f*ck must some people drag others through their b*llsh*t. There are two boys involved, plus a wife. House, bills everything. This kid has been living a lie with this woman for the last TEN YEARS!!!

The screwed up thing about it is, this a*sshole was sleeping with men then coming home to his wife.

If your gonna be a man, then stand up, be counted, and do right by your family. Sexuality has nothing to do with this sh*t. These DL brothers are a pariah on the Black community.

If there are holes in what I’m saying, I will be here to defend my position with clarification or retractions.


Be a MAN for Christ sakes.

TAC Blame society and the church for this problem....if society did not make homosexuality such a pariah with all the stigma that goes along with it, then little Johnny/Jane wouldn't have to hide or morph his/her sexuality into the fibers of the so called straight society so he/she could be accepted and/or get the same respect afforded to straight folks.

Blame yourselves for this everytime you make a face, a joke, a sneid(sp?) remark about gays or do nothing when you hear one.....

"Look Inside Yourself"!!!!

[darrow]

Originally posted by Leslie:
Does the "open" gay community confront this behaviour or do they just turn their heads? I ahve only seen articles written from the heterosexual position - what is being said on the other side.

JMJ - agreed about the issue of denial - ENOUGH! Hi Leslie

There's no one voice of the "open" gay community. You'll find that there are people who...

* decry the situation and denounce people like the one we are talking about
* try to understand and help people like the one we are talking about
* ignore it all unless it somehow hits them personally

And there's a host of reactions that fall somewhere among the ones I mentioned.

[ December 16, 2003, 01:38 PM: Message edited by: darrow ]

[Bold Soul]

Originally posted by darrow:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Leslie:
Does the "open" gay community confront this behaviour or do they just turn their heads? I ahve only seen articles written from the heterosexual position - what is being said on the other side.

JMJ - agreed about the issue of denial - ENOUGH! Hi Leslie

There's no one voice of the "open" gay community. You'll find that there are people who...

* decry the situation and denounce people like the one we are talking about
* try to understand and help people like the one we are talking about
* ignore it all unless it somehow hits them personally

And there's a host of reactions that fall somewhere amonth the ones I mentioned. </font>[/QUOTE]OPTION 2 - "try to understand and help people like the one we are talking about" is the higher path.

The next innovation that carries our species into a new level could come from someone who is homosexual. Here comes the baseball bat... :(

[liL Ray]

Originally posted by Danny Gardner:
[QUOTE] Indeed...and it's harmful to say the least. You have major entertainment industry and political players with all the riches in the world that viciously protect their "secret", complete with cover marriages, adopted children and hostile lawyers that crush those who find it their business to violently "out" them.

I've lost some loved ones to homophobia. I'm not passing judgement on TAC's friend. I'm passing judgement on a society that insists on shackling its citizenry to false ideals of sexuality. I didn't see this before I posted...just read TAC's first post, and had to write what I wrote...I see we are on the same path....hell, even Howard Stern said the stigma is what is causing all this crap.

When will we wake up...when will we see the cause behind the "problems"...this goes for many of societies problems...

[Ron la Rock]

I'm really trying 2 stay out of this 1
graemlins/jpshakehead.gif
yeah what Danny, Ray & wild I
said

[TAC]

Originally posted by Danny Gardner:
Fuck that "holier than thou" bullshit. You all can deal with the EFFECTS.No Danny, I think you skirted the issue, here. What we have is a result, i.e., a woman and two kids that now have to face life are being deceived by a man that was living a dual life. This is wrong. No, if, ands, or but about it.



I like looking at the CAUSES, and the causes here are the effects of a society that chooses to INSTITUTIONALLY SHUN other human beings via illusions of propriety.This is true, but lets try to tie this back into the topic at hand. Is it your position that the effect of being institutionally shunned is that one turns around and live a dual life in the manner at issue? I don't think that the causal relationship that you try to establish is as clear as that. For example, what about the people who ARE gay, but choose not to live in this manner.

What I hear you saying is that if your Gay, your shunned and therefore, the effect is that you live a closeted life. Not so. IMO, these people are simply selfish (I guess there's alot of other I could call em, but I'm not in their shoes so I'll hold my tongue), and take it upon themselves to remove the power of choice from their spouses.


Riddle me this, Batman...

Why is it only after homosexuals have taken their place among the breeder contingent of society has the United States started to seriously examine the issues of gay marriage and equal rights in full view of the public, hm? Yo, Robin, National policy is being implicated.

Peace
TAC

[darrow]

Sometimes I wonder if people watch too much tv or something. Maybe the public has become so used to seeing shows like Ellen, Will & Grace, Queer Eye, etc. that they believe that coming out and being out are easy for everone and anyone that faces sexuality issues.

I think people forget the amount of hate directed at gays (damn yall...you can be EXECUTED in some countries for being gay).

I think people forget the amount of shame that many people feel for being something that most of society still thinks of as perverse and in-need-of salvation at the most or therapy at the least.

I think people forget (or maybe they just plain ole don't know) how much damage you can do to yourself and loved-ones when you feel like you have to spend your life (from childhood on up) denying to friends, loved ones, coworkers, strangers, etc. what you are.

Unfortunately, those stupid-ass DL articles that have surfaced over the past few years do nothing to shed any real light on the issue of human behavior and how it's affected by culture and society. All those articles do is say "Booo! There's a bad black man out there and he's going to get you!!"

[liL Ray]

Originally posted by TAC:
[QUOTE] No Danny, I think you skirted the issue, here. What we have is a result, i.e., a woman and two kids that now have to face life are being deceived by a man that was living a dual life. This is wrong. No, if, ands, or but about it.
TAC, I can't believe you are not seeing this for what it is.....or Danny's point for that matter.....fuck the wife and kids!! Yeah, I said it!...there is a much bigger picture here....

This is wrong...for who?

[darrow]

By the way...

I'm not condoning dual lives at all. I've come across and counseled a few men who are in the thick of trying to resolve their duality and it's hard not to be directive and say "yo! get your shyt together and get out of that mess!!". BUT I know these guys have to come to their own conclusions about how to resolve things. Being directive rarely works in life-decision type situations.

[TAC]

The thread is getting twisted. Go back and read what I originally wrote. There is nothing wrong, IMO, with being Gay, or what have you. The problem here is that there are children, another adult, a home, etc.

The woman is a stay at home mother; MBA from Michigan who is now scrambling to re-enter the work force. The point is that she has been deceived for TEN years.

Is it right to deceive? Is it right to hide among the heteros because of one’s fear of being found out?

Who an adult sleeps with is nobody else’s business, except when it implicates other people’
s lives in negative (we’re talking about that triangle). This is the case, here.

Wild I, I do understand, but I have no quarter for those who will continue to perpetrate the deceit. Also, I am not so narrow minded to think that AIDS is a Gay disease. My point is that these women are thinking they are safe with their men, and they (their men) are simply OUT there. The result being that they are coming home and infecting their women. These women do nothing to deserve this.

Peace
TAC

[liL Ray]

Originally posted by TAC:


The woman is a stay at home mother; MBA from Michigan who is now scrambling to re-enter the work force. The point is that she has been deceived for TEN years. she saw what she wanted to see...there are many resons for this, one of them could be her own society-framed mind...Convo with herself at 3years in the marriage: "Naw, I didn't just see that, not my man, couldn't be....if he was he wouldn't marry me...Nah"......heah, wake up, he married you because he LOVED you!!....ooooh, I think I opened up a new can of worms....how can he loved her if he's a homosexual?.....hahahahahahaha....

[Mack-Williams]

It is wrong to be going outside of your marriage rather it be with homosexual or hetrosexual. You are putting your wife at risk of catching a disease either way it goes. He is wrong for lying to his wife from the get go if he knew he liked men.

[TAC]

Originally posted by liL Ray:
I can't believe you are not seeing this for what it is...there is a much bigger picture here....Dude, I can see Danny's point, but that's not what I am talking about. Okay, you want to talk about what causes some people to choose to lead the dual life, then we can. But it still does not change the fact that people's lives are getting f*cked up.


So let me ask you this, what do you tell those boys when they get older given the state of society and the way it feels about homosexuals?

[Bold Soul]

Well GEE WHIZ, TAC - your gossiping about other people's lives in PUBLIC actually led to one of the most positive, enlightening and POWERFUL discussions on the DHP for some time.

I'd applaud you, but then you just wanted us to bash your friend, right?

[liL Ray]

Originally posted by TAC:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by liL Ray:
I can't believe you are not seeing this for what it is...there is a much bigger picture here....Dude, I can see Danny's point, but that's not what I am talking about. Okay, you want to talk about what causes some people to choose to lead the dual life, then we can. But it still does not change the fact that people's lives are getting f*cked up.


So let me ask you this, what do you tell those boys when they get older given the state of society and the way it feels about homosexuals? </font>[/QUOTE]You tell them the same fucking thing that a straight divorce couple would tell there kids....your Daddy love you, this was not your fault, we just couldn't continue on the same path....

or, what, you think there was never any love....if you think that then you are truly bugging....

[Mack-Williams]

Originally posted by liL Ray:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by TAC:


The woman is a stay at home mother; MBA from Michigan who is now scrambling to re-enter the work force. The point is that she has been deceived for TEN years. she saw what she wanted to see...there are many resons for this, one of them could be her own society-framed mind...Convo with herself at 3years in the marriage: "Naw, I didn't just see that, not my man, couldn't be....if he was he wouldn't marry me...Nah"......heah, wake up, he married you because he LOVED you!!....ooooh, I think I opened up a new can of worms....how can he loved her if he's a homosexual?.....hahahahahahaha.... </font>[/QUOTE]He was selfish and only lying to himself. You don't fuck up peoples lives like that. If he really loved her he would have told her before he married her, but you know the world is not made like that. Self, self, self.

[TAC]

Originally posted by liL Ray:
she saw what she wanted to see... The plot thickens. Yup, there was some level of collusion on her part. The word is she suspected, but it did not click. During a conversation with another female friend of her's it clicked. Sort of like http://deephousepage.com/smilies/conf45.gif, and then hse confonted him with it.

But sometimes, you have no idea. What say you?

[corwin]

What we have is a result, i.e., a woman and two kids that now have to face life are being deceived by a man that was living a dual life. This is wrong. No, if, ands, or but about it.


TAC, you are soooooooooo right.

My married uncle in Boston had a mistress AND children tucked away in a quaint little house in a quaint little conservative God-fearing neighborhood in Georgia. It took years before my aunt was confronted with the inevitable baby mama drama.

Too bad she didn't have a sense of humor about the whole thing.

Boys will be boys, after all.

[liL Ray]

I believed this guy may have loved this women more than most straight men loved their wife....it would be too lenghty to develop the theory....which is what all this is, theory, because you never know what goes on in a couples household....who to tell, maybe she was too embarass to say she knew what was going on after the preacher and family member busted him and told her....damn, I'm good!!

[ December 16, 2003, 02:13 PM: Message edited by: liL Ray ]

[Ron la Rock]

Originally posted by TAC:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Danny Gardner:
Fuck that "holier than thou" bullshit. You all can deal with the EFFECTS.No Danny, I think you skirted the issue, here. What we have is a result, i.e., a woman and two kids that now have to face life are being deceived by a man that was living a dual life. This is wrong. No, if, ands, or but about it.



I like looking at the CAUSES, and the causes here are the effects of a society that chooses to INSTITUTIONALLY SHUN other human beings via illusions of propriety.This is true, but lets try to tie this back into the topic at hand. Is it your position that the effect of being institutionally shunned is that one turns around and live a dual life in the manner at issue? I don't think that the causal relationship that you try to establish is as clear as that. For example, what about the people who ARE gay, but choose not to live in this manner.

What I hear you saying is that if your Gay, your shunned and therefore, the effect is that you live a closeted life. Not so. IMO, these people are simply selfish (I guess there's alot of other I could call em, but I'm not in their shoes so I'll hold my tongue), and take it upon themselves to remove the power of choice from their spouses.


Riddle me this, Batman...

Why is it only after homosexuals have taken their place among the breeder contingent of society has the United States started to seriously examine the issues of gay marriage and equal rights in full view of the public, hm? Yo, Robin, National policy is being implicated.

Peace
TAC </font>[/QUOTE]Tac sounds like you want to still roast the guy
cause hes gay
???
not because he cheated if would have been one of your straight patna's out on the prowl bangin some fine ass sista on the side of his wife who came clean or got caught would you
feel the same way
???
no doubt its still would be screwed up but you probabley be more inclined to ,take the (straight)
guy 4 drink and let him know yo Dog it aint cool but
it be like that and when he showed you a pic of the lady on the side
you go damm son i feel why you did it
am i right or wrong???

but this gay dude is the scum of the earth
is the most morally corrupt insult 2 man a liar beyond compare needs a wholy water bath disgraced the black race (male image at least) his family
ands should be stoned
and I'm 2 believe his son
showing behavor problems
because his father is gay according to your post
???

lets say try applying what you and we black males go thru (without macho stereotyping our struggles)
in society & corp amerikkka for at least a minute
we to wear a dual face where we are constantly
pre judged/de-humanized/demonized in many aspect now add this other dimension 2 it
see what feelings you can conjure up with
then get back me

by the way know
one justufying the lying nor being lied 2 but the root of this is what other are posting about

feel me?

[TAC]

Originally posted by Danny Gardner:
you just wanted us to bash your friend, right? Nope. He's not really that close to me. He is a weird f*ck. I'll still speak to him, but that does not change my opinion of the situation.

I posted my opinion up front. I only used the scenario to get us talking about the problem itself in OUR community, itself.

Peace
TAC

[liL Ray]

Originally posted by TAC:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by liL Ray:
she saw what she wanted to see... The plot thickens. Yup, there was some level of collusion on her part. The word is she suspected, but it did not click. During a conversation with another female friend of her's it clicked. Sort of like http://deephousepage.com/smilies/conf45.gif, and then hse confonted him with it.

But sometimes, you have no idea. What say you? </font>[/QUOTE]and you, a thinking lawyer, believe this?....hahahahahaha....remind me to take you off retainer...

[liL Ray]

heah Tac, stop thinking like a family member, and use what made you successful...if you really believe she just came to the realization when a friend laid it all out to her, then I got a bridge I wanna sell you...big income property.... :D

[Bold Soul]

Originally posted by TAC:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Danny Gardner:
you just wanted us to bash your friend, right? Nope. He's not really that close to me. He is a weird f*ck. I'll still speak to him, but that does not change my opinion of the situation.

I posted my opinion up front. I only used the scenario to get us talking about the problem itself in OUR community, itself.

Peace
TAC </font>[/QUOTE]Right. This is see - and I'm approaching the problem from another angle.

Just fuckin' witcha, man! You know it's all graemlins/respekt.gif over here.

[TAC]

Originally posted by Ron la Rock:
not because he cheated if would have been one of your straight patna's out on the prowl bangin some fine ass sista on the side of his wife who came clean or got caught would you
feel the same way
???
no doubt its still would be screwed up but you probabley be more inclined to ,take the (straight)
guy 4 drink and let him know yo Dog it aint cool but
it be like that and when he showed you a pic of the lady on the side
you go damm son i feel why you did it
am i right or wrong???
Alot to address, but at some point you have to grow up. As I have grown up, I've tended to distance myself from these sorts of people. This is part of the problem, i.e., the pat of the back of the hetero but the disdain of the gay.

I ain't roasting nobody, just the situation. I'll say it again though, DL brothers are a phariah on the Black community.

Stand the f*ck up and be counted. Be a MAN.

Peace
TAC

[Leslie]

What's love go to do with it? Where is the resepct or is that not at issue here?

[JMJ]

Originally posted by liL Ray:
heah Tac, stop thinking like a family member, and use what made you successful...if you really believe she just came to the realization when a friend laid it all out to her, then I got a bridge I wanna sell you...big income property.... :D She was in denial too.....JMJ

[TAC]

Yo Ray, you got jokes.... I'm just relaying what the monkey told me.

[DLow]

Originally posted by liL Ray:
....if society did not make homosexuality such a pariah with all the stigma that goes along with it, then little Johnny/Jane wouldn't have to hide or morph his/her sexuality into the fibers of the so called straight society so he/she could be accepted and/or get the same respect afforded to straight folks.This is very true...but how do you explain this to a child? All they know is Daddy can't be here in the house with us anymore. When that nugget of truth sets in with the children, the next question is, WHY. That's where the irresponsibility comes into play on the part of dude.

[JMJ]

Originally posted by Leslie:
What's love go to do with it? Where is the resepct or is that not at issue here? Looks more like selfishness on his part. He loves her as a person and she's probably a great mother to his kids, which is all he really wanted from her anyway (kids), and that wasn't going to happen as a gay man, so now that the kids are getting a little older, the charade is over......JMJ

[Wild i]

CHEATERS SUCK! CHEATING SUCKS!

I believe that should satisfy your entire premise, TAC.

I also believe that you fail to realize your own homophobia in this. WAIT! WAIT! WAIT! Climb down off the desk. I'm sure over the years you've known many men who have cheated on their wives with other women and women who've cheated with other men, but I've never seen you post about them. Certainly nothing so vitriolic. It seems your issue is that he's gay and he's been lying about it. Is that really any different from he's a snake and he's been lying about it? How about he's an alcoholic and he's been lying about it? How about gambler. Secret smoker? Internet junkie?

Seems to me you were shocked to find out the dude was gay and you take issue with it, but you couch under outrage that he decieved his family.

[Bold Soul]

Originally posted by Derrick:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by liL Ray:
....if society did not make homosexuality such a pariah with all the stigma that goes along with it, then little Johnny/Jane wouldn't have to hide or morph his/her sexuality into the fibers of the so called straight society so he/she could be accepted and/or get the same respect afforded to straight folks.This is very true...but how do you explain this to a child? All they know is Daddy can't be here in the house with us anymore. When that nugget of truth sets in with the children, the next question is, WHY. That's where the irresponsibility comes into play on the part of dude. </font>[/QUOTE]So it's going to kill the children to learn that their father and mother split up because he was closeted? Again, this is the same thinking that had my man in the closet in the first place.

You want to see how well children can live with the "HORROR" of learning a parent is gay? Coach a kid's soccer team in LA sometime.

[liL Ray]

Originally posted by Derrick:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by liL Ray:
....if society did not make homosexuality such a pariah with all the stigma that goes along with it, then little Johnny/Jane wouldn't have to hide or morph his/her sexuality into the fibers of the so called straight society so he/she could be accepted and/or get the same respect afforded to straight folks.This is very true...but how do you explain this to a child? All they know is Daddy can't be here in the house with us anymore. When that nugget of truth sets in with the children, the next question is, WHY. That's where the irresponsibility comes into play on the part of dude. </font>[/QUOTE]but isn't this the same problem that a stright couple goes through when the husband or wife cheats?

[corwin]

Originally posted by Derrick:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by liL Ray:
....if society did not make homosexuality such a pariah with all the stigma that goes along with it, then little Johnny/Jane wouldn't have to hide or morph his/her sexuality into the fibers of the so called straight society so he/she could be accepted and/or get the same respect afforded to straight folks.This is very true...but how do you explain this to a child? All they know is Daddy can't be here in the house with us anymore. When that nugget of truth sets in with the children, the next question is, WHY. That's where the irresponsibility comes into play on the part of dude. </font>[/QUOTE]OK...let's turn up the heat a little.

Since we're asking questions......

What does she tell her children if they are abandoned for a another woman or he becomes drug addicted?

WHAT does she tell them when he is incarcerated--like many black American men--where he can only have sexual relationships with other men?

[ December 16, 2003, 02:28 PM: Message edited by: corwin ]

[Mack-Williams]

Just tell the kids the truth and don't sugar coat it.

[DLow]

Originally posted by Danny Gardner:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Derrick:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by liL Ray:
....if society did not make homosexuality such a pariah with all the stigma that goes along with it, then little Johnny/Jane wouldn't have to hide or morph his/her sexuality into the fibers of the so called straight society so he/she could be accepted and/or get the same respect afforded to straight folks.This is very true...but how do you explain this to a child? All they know is Daddy can't be here in the house with us anymore. When that nugget of truth sets in with the children, the next question is, WHY. That's where the irresponsibility comes into play on the part of dude. </font>[/QUOTE]So it's going to kill the children to learn that their father and mother split up because he was closeted? Again, this is the same thinking that had my man in the closet in the first place.

You want to see how well children can live with the "HORROR" of learning a parent is gay? Coach a kid's soccer team in LA sometime. </font>[/QUOTE]I said nothing of the 'horror' of that revelation 'killing' the children. My point was, as it is, the subject of homosexuality brings about negativety, as pointed out by Ray...with that stigma existing among ADULTS, how does the wife explain that stigma to her CHILDREN that are directly effected?

[TAC]

Originally posted by Wild i:
[snip...]I also believe that you fail to realize your own homophobia in this. WAIT! WAIT! WAIT! Climb down off the desk. I'm sure over the years you've known many men who have cheated on their wives with other women and women who've cheated with other men, but I've never seen you post about them. Certainly nothing so vitriolic. It seems your issue is that he's gay and he's been lying about it. Is that really any different from he's a snake and he's been lying about it? How about he's an alcoholic and he's been lying about it? How about gambler. Secret smoker? Internet junkie?

Seems to me you were shocked to find out the dude was gay and you take issue with it, but you couch under outrage that he decieved his family. Yes, you are right about my homophobia. Don't we all entertain some to a certain extent?

Now let me dismiss your argument with ridicule that you may expect. Yes, I have deep seated fears about getting plooped in the a*ss by some sweating well hung dude. Yes, I have even cracked the joke about not dropping the soap in the shower when in jail, although I have been fortunate to never have been incarcerated. Is this what you want to here?

At the bottom of it all, you refuse to grasp the notion that these dudes are passing around a deadly disease by way of their behavior. I am talking about DL men who are leading promiscuous lives and KILLING Black women for their own selfish reasons.

Don’t get it twisted. The Phariah is these men who are leading a lifestyle that is lethal to the Black woman. Get your heads around this notion.


P.S. sorry, but in my own snobbish, privileged life, I have not know the “[lying] alcoholic…[the] gambler. Secret smoker…or the Internet junkie?” Although I may fit the bill on the last one.

Peace
TAC

[liL Ray]

Originally posted by Derrick:
[QUOTE] My point was, as it is, the subject of homosexuality brings about negativety, as pointed out by Ray...with that stigma existing among ADULTS, how does the wife explain that stigma to her CHILDREN that are directly effected? I think this would be an opportunity, if she was smart, to BREAK! the stigma...especially since her children are a direct result of this. It would be the right thing to do...the thinking thing to do...

[DLow]

Originally posted by liL Ray:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Derrick:

My point was, as it is, the subject of homosexuality brings about negativety, as pointed out by Ray...with that stigma existing among ADULTS, how does the wife explain that stigma to her CHILDREN that are directly effected? I think this would be an opportunity, if she was smart, to BREAK! the stigma...especially since her children are a direct result of this. It would be the right thing to do...the thinking thing to do... </font>Ray, it took a minute, but I see your point. Education is the key...

[MYOR]

Originally posted by TAC:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Wild i:
[snip...]I also believe that you fail to realize your own homophobia in this. WAIT! WAIT! WAIT! Climb down off the desk. I'm sure over the years you've known many men who have cheated on their wives with other women and women who've cheated with other men, but I've never seen you post about them. Certainly nothing so vitriolic. It seems your issue is that he's gay and he's been lying about it. Is that really any different from he's a snake and he's been lying about it? How about he's an alcoholic and he's been lying about it? How about gambler. Secret smoker? Internet junkie?

Seems to me you were shocked to find out the dude was gay and you take issue with it, but you couch under outrage that he decieved his family. Yes, you are right about my homophobia. Don't we all entertain some to a certain extent?

Now let me dismiss your argument with ridicule that you may expect. Yes, I have deep seated fears about getting plooped in the a*ss by some sweating well hung dude. Yes, I have even cracked the joke about not dropping the soap in the shower when in jail, although I have been fortunate to never have been incarcerated. Is this what you want to here?

At the bottom of it all, you refuse to grasp the notion that these dudes are passing around a deadly disease by way of their behavior. I am talking about DL men who are leading promiscuous lives and KILLING Black women for their own selfish reasons.

Don’t get it twisted. The Phariah is these men who are leading a lifestyle that is lethal to the Black woman. Get your heads around this notion.


P.S. sorry, but in my own snobbish, privileged life, I have not know the “[lying] alcoholic…[the] gambler. Secret smoker…or the Internet junkie?” Although I may fit the bill on the last one.

Peace
TAC </font>[/QUOTE]The point you seem to not mention is that straigt men also pass disease with their DL behavior.. Aids and other STDs are not limited to gay men..

[Huey P. Freeman]

Originally posted by MYOR:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by TAC:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Wild i:
[snip...]I also believe that you fail to realize your own homophobia in this. WAIT! WAIT! WAIT! Climb down off the desk. I'm sure over the years you've known many men who have cheated on their wives with other women and women who've cheated with other men, but I've never seen you post about them. Certainly nothing so vitriolic. It seems your issue is that he's gay and he's been lying about it. Is that really any different from he's a snake and he's been lying about it? How about he's an alcoholic and he's been lying about it? How about gambler. Secret smoker? Internet junkie?

Seems to me you were shocked to find out the dude was gay and you take issue with it, but you couch under outrage that he decieved his family. Yes, you are right about my homophobia. Don't we all entertain some to a certain extent?

Now let me dismiss your argument with ridicule that you may expect. Yes, I have deep seated fears about getting plooped in the a*ss by some sweating well hung dude. Yes, I have even cracked the joke about not dropping the soap in the shower when in jail, although I have been fortunate to never have been incarcerated. Is this what you want to here?

At the bottom of it all, you refuse to grasp the notion that these dudes are passing around a deadly disease by way of their behavior. I am talking about DL men who are leading promiscuous lives and KILLING Black women for their own selfish reasons.

Don’t get it twisted. The Phariah is these men who are leading a lifestyle that is lethal to the Black woman. Get your heads around this notion.


P.S. sorry, but in my own snobbish, privileged life, I have not know the “[lying] alcoholic…[the] gambler. Secret smoker…or the Internet junkie?” Although I may fit the bill on the last one.

Peace
TAC </font>[/QUOTE]The point you seem to not mention is that straigt men also pass disease with their DL behavior.. Aids and other STDs are not limited to gay men.. </font>[/QUOTE]Agreed but on a much smaller scale. I remember hearing on a tv show about stds that the likelyhood of a man getting HIV from a woman through vaginal sex is very very small. This may be propoganda put out by the religious fanatics but i'm not sure. That show was not the only time I have heard this.

[Keith Blackstone]

Originally posted by Eargasm:
Agreed but on a much smaller scale. I remember hearing on a tv show about stds that the likelyhood of a man getting HIV from a woman through vaginal sex is very very small. This may be propoganda put out by the religious fanatics but i'm not sure. That show was not the only time I have heard this. Not on a smaller scale at all... don't be fooled. And the stuff you're mentioning only discusses the fact that it's easier for a man to give it to a woman, then the other way around... "easier" is the key word. That doesn't mean that women aren't spreading it to men every single day just like men are too women. Get off the gay trip...

[Huey P. Freeman]

Originally posted by Keith Blackstone:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Eargasm:
Agreed but on a much smaller scale. I remember hearing on a tv show about stds that the likelyhood of a man getting HIV from a woman through vaginal sex is very very small. This may be propoganda put out by the religious fanatics but i'm not sure. That show was not the only time I have heard this. Not on a smaller scale at all... don't be fooled. And the stuff you're mentioning only discusses the fact that it's easier for a man to give it to a woman, then the other way around... "easier" is the key word. That doesn't mean that women aren't spreading it to men every single day just like men are too women. Get off the gay trip... </font>[/QUOTE]Dude you do not know me or my views on homosexuality. I'm on no gay trip. That is an ignorant assumption on your part. I'm relaying information I heard on a show about that topic that had multiple "experts" on the subject. I even acknowleddged that the info might have been propoganda. Maybe you should read what I wrote again. You seemed to have missed a little the first time.

[Keith Blackstone]

perhaps I need to be clearer... "you" in my reference does not specifically refer to "you" Eargasm... with respect to the gay trip comment.

my bad on the confusion.

[ December 16, 2003, 03:30 PM: Message edited by: Keith Blackstone ]

[TAC]

Originally posted by MYOR:
The point you seem to not mention is that straight men also pass disease with their DL behavior.. Aids and other STDs are not limited to gay men.. You busted me... I thought I could skirt this issue that you so observantly bring up. But the truth is, we're really talking about unhealty behavior, ain't we? The example of DL men is but one of them.

Peace
TAC

[Friday]

WOW! Just got through reading this whole thread and it is another indication of a wake up call!

The divisions in our society we constantly hold as true are the beliefs of yesteryears. We have broken down our society into the black, the whites, the religious, the patriots, the etc, etc...... within these divisions are the illusions of what is right or wrong. Yes the man in question did marry under the pretense of being straight, yes he could not keep the illusion he was no doubtly felt compelled to carry out. Did he hurt others, no, did he decieve others, no, was he wrong no. The point of the matter was he did what he could because of the fear of being ostracized.

We create the conditions in which we all choose to live in, we all create the environment that others have to adhere to, we all are responsible for what happened here.

The more we cling to ideals that we did not make the more damage others will do to themselves creating more damage to others. The cycle will never end.

If each of us were to examine just how many divisions we create within our own selves and what we project out into society, we would find the many predjudices we own and the illusive thinking of what is right or wrong....these ideals/divisions are so wrapped up in respectability and what is constituted as proper behaviour.

To move forward is the key now, to live in truth of who you. Bravo for him finally accepting who he was and being courageous & responsible enough to finally admit to his wife of who he was. Should he be further ostracized, no.

We all have created this society, if each one of us is resposible enough to look inside themselves and recognize how they create and are responsible for the divisions of this society and why they do it, perhaps we have a better chance of improving everyone's quality of live.

btw, I love this!

ok off my soap box. http://deephousepage.com/smilies/wink_2.gif

[ December 16, 2003, 05:50 PM: Message edited by: gf ]

[Moksha]

i know others in this situation ; the kids turned out great, the parents remained friends.

So, the situation is not necessarily bad.

What was this guy supposed to do? obviously, he should've gotten out sooner. . .but when did he realize? plus, how hard must it have been to tell the wife, who he probably loved and didn't want to hurt? should he have just continued pretending? what if you, TAC, were in his family situation, and tomorrow came to grips with your homosexuality? would you be to blame for having a family while repressing your true self?

In many ways, he is a victim of a society-born psychological disorder. His repression kept him from living the life he would have otherwise chosen to live. once his repression subsided, he had to live with terrible fear. . .from his community, family, and people like you who would condemn him. let's not pretend this was a cakewalk for him. while not as difficult as the wife's position, he's surely been through a living hell too. but, if they are strong, their childeren will not suffer.

Danny and Ray are on point.

[Bold Soul]

To the DHP's holier than thou contingent...

Take your dusty laws, your clay gods, your notions of propriety. Just leave me the beauty of the human species. I'll take everyone that doesn't measure up to your standards. Cast your condemned to me, for these are the greatest among you.

[Friday]

Originally posted by Danny Gardner:
To the DHP's holier than thou contingent...

Take your dusty laws, your clay gods, your notions of propriety. Just leave me the beauty of the human species. I'll take everyone that doesn't measure up to your standards. Cast your condemned to me, for these are the greatest among you. It would be delightful to stand next to you and welcome them all!

The foundation can be set but who among you all are ready to be the pillars and stand equal amongst each other?

[Wild i]

Originally posted by TAC:
Don't we all entertain some to a certain extent?

No


Yes, I have deep seated fears about getting plooped in the a*ss by some sweating well hung dude.

Me too, and not just because I don't do men anymore. Got a big tatoo on my ass says ONE WAY

I'm just gonna edit your next statement to make it accurate:

...these dudes are passing around a deadly disease by way of their behavior. I am talking about men who are leading promiscuous lives and KILLING Black women for their own selfish reasons.


Don’t get it twisted. The Phariah is these men who are leading a lifestyle that is lethal to the Black woman. Get your heads around this notion.
Long before we get to death gonorrhea can make a woman sterile. Syphillus can make her blind and make body parts (nose) fall off. Clamidia can go on undetected for DECADES. Herpes stays with you for life. ALL OF THESE THINGS CAN BE PASSED ON TO A FETUS.

Everyone's all het up about AIDS and blaming in on homosexual behavior, but cheaters have been taking disease home to their wives since men discovered sheep.


I repeat: CHEATING SUCKS! CHEATERS SUCK!

[TAD]

consider this. those two children would not be here today if he had decided to pursue his "true self" from the beginning. maybe the super sperm hold the power to suppress the true self until their job is done.

Faster Than A Speeding Bullet (http://www.wired.com/news/technology/0,1282,33788,00.html)

[TAC]

Originally posted by Wild i:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by TAC:
Don't we all entertain some to a certain extent?

No


Yes, I have deep seated fears about getting plooped in the a*ss by some sweating well hung dude.

Me too, and not just because I don't do men anymore. Got a big tatoo on my ass says ONE WAY

I'm just gonna edit your next statement to make it accurate:

...these dudes are passing around a deadly disease by way of their behavior. I am talking about men who are leading promiscuous lives and KILLING Black women for their own selfish reasons.


Don’t get it twisted. The Phariah is these men who are leading a lifestyle that is lethal to the Black woman. Get your heads around this notion.
Long before we get to death gonorrhea can make a woman sterile. Syphillus can make her blind and make body parts (nose) fall off. Clamidia can go on undetected for DECADES. Herpes stays with you for life. ALL OF THESE THINGS CAN BE PASSED ON TO A FETUS.

Everyone's all het up about AIDS and blaming in on homosexual behavior, but cheaters have been taking disease home to their wives since men discovered sheep.


I repeat: CHEATING SUCKS! CHEATERS SUCK! </font>[/QUOTE]We got you heated Wild I. Calm down cause you missed my sarcasm.... I'm tired of this thread.


Okay, so the bottom line is that the behavior is okay cause society forces these men to lead dual lives. I understand it now. Its all clear to me.

[AK]

Interesting points abound. I will only add that I am very close to someone--an adult--whose parents divorced when he/she was a child after the discovery of the father's homosexuality. To say this person remains major scarred, particularly by the homosexuality aspect of this, would be an understatement. No judgments or social commentary here; just one person's reality that I thought might add to the discussion.

On another note, it seems to me this situation--and the spouse's denial--is quite prevalent. I know quite a number of married men with children whom I am (and many others are) virtually certain are gay. Interesting.

[AD]

That's just wrong. graemlins/jpshakehead.gif

[the crackhouse]

Pfff... Mind your own business.
Adultery, may it be in gay or hetero is a very special story each time.
I'm not defending the guy or trying to make shit, but let's face it : we don't know the whole story, so what do we have to say about it ?
When any DHP married men looks at a lady in the street and think "what a fine butt", it's the start to adultery.
This couple is in trouble, but better try, (you TAC) to help THEM find an exit to this mess, but let's not start on GAY/BLACK/SEXUALITY arguing...

Solving this problem (for the kids, for an equilibrium, for the couple, to understand what the real deal is...) is the only thing that should be discussed here.
IMO.

[Musica]

Originally posted by darrow:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Danny Gardner:
As intolerant as the Black community is toward homosexuality, the streets must be lined with stories such as these.

Then again, that's slave Christianity for you. It's not just the Black community though. There are men and families from all walks of life going through this and similar situations. </font>[/QUOTE]Anthony "Psycho" Perkins was a perfect example of this

[Wild i]

Originally posted by TAC:
We got you heated Wild I. Calm down cause you missed my sarcasm.... I'm tired of this thread.


Okay, so the bottom line is that the behavior is okay cause society forces these men to lead dual lives. I understand it now. Its all clear to me. I ain't mad atcha! I just think the argument and reasoning behind it is beneath you. I'm not arguing for the rightness of his dual life. All I'm saying is that it has nothing to do with him doing dudes. I'm also trying to get you to recognize your own bias in this.

I've been with my wife for almost 10 years and, although I have often considered leaving and setting things up so that I could move into another relationship if I did leave, I have never once considered cheating. I'll even admit that I've given a passing glance to some of this exceptional fella out here, but that would only be after I left, not while I was still tied to my vows.

CHEATING SUCKS! CHEATERS SUCK!

[TAC]

Originally posted by Wild i:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by TAC:
We got you heated Wild I. Calm down cause you missed my sarcasm.... I'm tired of this thread.


Okay, so the bottom line is that the behavior is okay cause society forces these men to lead dual lives. I understand it now. Its all clear to me. I ain't mad atcha! I just think the argument and reasoning behind it is beneath you. I'm not arguing for the rightness of his dual life. All I'm saying is that it has nothing to do with him doing dudes. I'm also trying to get you to recognize your own bias in this.

I've been with my wife for almost 10 years and, although I have often considered leaving and setting things up so that I could move into another relationship if I did leave, I have never once considered cheating. I'll even admit that I've given a passing glance to some of this exceptional fella out here, but that would only be after I left, not while I was still tied to my vows.

CHEATING SUCKS! CHEATERS SUCK! </font>[/QUOTE]Batty boys...

[sammyrock]

In my opinion T.A.C most gay men do that in order to fit in the work environment.Gay men or women are not accepted unless they have a family or are engaged to the opposite sex.Now that homosexuals are being more accepted by our society they can finally come out of the closet.Just my 0 cents.

[TAC]

Originally posted by sammyrock:
In my opinion T.A.C most gay men do that in order to fit in the work environment.Gay men or women are not accepted unless they have a family or are engaged to the opposite sex.Now that homosexuals are being more accepted by our society they can finally come out of the closet.Just my 0 cents. This turned into a gay bashing thread, which was not the orignal intention. It was really about one individual who HAPPENED to be gay who f*cked over some people.

But since some of those here who are living in that life style seem to have a problem with accepting that simple fact, then let them fester in their own insecurities. And I going to through all the sterotypes out there to get em riled (sp?) up. So keep coming cause I'll spit out all the b*llshit homophobic dogma that your just waiting to hear so that I get get that Pavlove response from ya'll.

Now, keeping the issue narrow as I have continually tried to do, Black men who are on the DL are a Phariah on the Black community. Accept that fact, or leave it.

If you wanna talk about other types of lifestyles and their harmful effects, this ain't the thread.

I'mma jump in that a** like MAGUS. Be a MAN for Christ sake. Our children have enough problems living in this nation without us KNOWINGLY handing them a whole bunch of more sh*t to deal with.

Yea, chew on that. I'll say it again, if your Gay so what, so f*cking what? I have Gay people in ALL areas of my life, and I mean ALL areas. I ain't loosing no sleep over it. My simple point is/was don't drag a whole bunch of other people down a pole without giving them the option to choose whether they want to deal with such a situation.

Who knows, perhaps she might have even been willing to deal if he had told her, who knows.

I'm really tired of this thread. Besides, I got my own pot of relationship sh*t to stir.

Peace
TAC

[corwin]

Originally posted by TAC:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Wild i:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by TAC:
We got you heated Wild I. Calm down cause you missed my sarcasm.... I'm tired of this thread.


Okay, so the bottom line is that the behavior is okay cause society forces these men to lead dual lives. I understand it now. Its all clear to me. I ain't mad atcha! I just think the argument and reasoning behind it is beneath you. I'm not arguing for the rightness of his dual life. All I'm saying is that it has nothing to do with him doing dudes. I'm also trying to get you to recognize your own bias in this.

I've been with my wife for almost 10 years and, although I have often considered leaving and setting things up so that I could move into another relationship if I did leave, I have never once considered cheating. I'll even admit that I've given a passing glance to some of this exceptional fella out here, but that would only be after I left, not while I was still tied to my vows.

CHEATING SUCKS! CHEATERS SUCK! </font>[/QUOTE]Batty boys... </font>[/QUOTE]:rolleyes:

I've tried to stay out this, but you've gone too far.

NOBODY in this thread has defended the selfish behaviour your "friend".

Stop hiding behind your faux-humanitarian facade and say what this is really about. If this were 1983, and AIDS hadn't yet devasted the hetero population, you'd still be spouting the same moralistic bullshit.

As someone whose lost many loved ones to this disease--and dedicated much of my time to volunteer work, where I've LISTENED to folks speak candidly about the virus and it's effect on their lives--I find your tone highly offensive.

At least Uncle-Tom Ass Bobby had the balls to say what was really on his mind, instead of playing Affable Guy.

YOU be a MAN.

[la verde]

Originally posted by St Magus the Reviled:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by MYOR:
Until its ok to be openly gay.. this will continue to happen.. especially in latin and black macho society.. serious question...how much more open is open </font>[/QUOTE]if you can see light from the other side.. thats open!