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Dee-Dee Sheridan
10-27-2003, 11:12 AM
New members are to give their checking and savings account numbers to the Mission sisters upon registration. Sis Ida Mae, who was cleared of all charges of embezzlement, will be taking this information.


50 Cent CDs in Yolanda Adams jackets will be sold in the fellowship hall. Keep it on the DL...it ain't everybody's business what we do.


The Pastor is asking that everyone who just HAS TO LAUGH when Ms. Hattie is singing, could you please throw at least one amen in there cause yall hurting her feelings.


Our new piano player, Jerome, hails from Lulu's House of Chicken and Entertainment. We will be ordering his new rainbow colored piano bench out of money given to the building fund.


The Youth Choir will be putting on their annual play. This year they will be performing, "My Momma Didn't Steal Yo' Check." We are asking in advance that Lil' Maria not sing the lead. Face it Big Maria, ya' child can't sing. Now let's consider this matter closed and not brought up again, especially in the presence of the children.


Anyone looking to join the "Wessss~Siiide Afro Mass Choir" must attend the meeting in the back of the fellowship hall. Bring 2 pictures before and after Fro to put in the new members bulletin. Picks will be supplied by the President.


If you ain't been to church in 6 months, you are considered a visitor. So when the time comes, please stand. Some people don't like when we start singing, "It's Some Visitors In This House, When You See 'Em Point 'Em Out!!!" Save yourself the embarrassment.


We are having a Bake Sale next Saturday. If you see your name, don't bother to bring anything. The church does not have "diarrhea" insurance and is tired of being sued. Here we go: Sista Jenkins, Sista Martin, Sister Lattimo' (she don't like to be called Lattimore), Sista Beulah and the lady who's always smiling (sorry sister we don't know your name)


It has been brought to Pastor's attention that some of the members thinks it's okay to take off their shoes in church. Stank feet makes it impossible to concentrate on the Word.


We will be taking up a collection for the annual Pastor's Gold Teeth Fund. He will be having them polished and will be adding two more. Hallelujah.


The deadline for entering the Big Hat contest has passed so ladies and Jerome, please stop wearing your big hats. The people behind you can't see.


Anyone caught eating in the church will be asked to leave if they didn't bring enough for the pastor's wife. Yall know she greedy and it just ain't right to tempt her.


Ushers: We don't mind you doing the prep when you're marching in front of the choir, but we do ask that you take out the "hand in your face" step. A few ladies have been complaining about their wigs being knocked off.


The Church's annual anniversary dinner........ We are serving punch, fried chicken, greens and corn bread. The price is, $50.00 per plate and we do not accept checks or credit cards. Don't forget to come early, you know they always running out of chicken.


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[ October 27, 2003, 03:47 PM: Message edited by: Dee-Dee Sheridan ]

Dee-Dee Sheridan
10-27-2003, 03:47 PM
BUMP

shannoneileen
10-27-2003, 04:01 PM
Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:

The Pastor is asking that everyone who just HAS TO LAUGH when Ms. Hattie is singing, could you please throw at least one amen in there cause yall hurting her feelings.


If you ain't been to church in 6 months, you are considered a visitor. So when the time comes, please stand. Some people don't like when we start singing, "It's Some Visitors In This House, When You See 'Em Point 'Em Out!!!" Save yourself the embarrassment.


We are having a Bake Sale next Saturday. If you see your name, don't bother to bring anything. The church does not have "diarrhea" insurance and is tired of being sued. Here we go: Sista Jenkins, Sista Martin, Sister Lattimo' (she don't like to be called Lattimore), Sista Beulah and the lady who's always smiling (sorry sister we don't know your name)


Ushers: We don't mind you doing the prep when you're marching in front of the choir, but we do ask that you take out the "hand in your face" step. A few ladies have been complaining about their wigs being knocked off.


The Church's annual anniversary dinner........ We are serving punch, fried chicken, greens and corn bread. The price is, $50.00 per plate and we do not accept checks or credit cards. Don't forget to come early, you know they always running out of chicken.


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> [/QB]CTFU!!!! thass fuunnny! so you know my grandaddy chuuurch huh? LMAO!!! icon_rofl.gif

Dee-Dee Sheridan
10-27-2003, 04:04 PM
It had my cracking up too. I can definately relate. graemlins/rofl.gif

BHouse
10-27-2003, 04:10 PM
I ain't been back to church since being kicked out for laughing and eating penny candy in Sunday School... The teacher pulled me in the hallway. Snatched me by my collar, making my snap on tie come off and tell me "You better sit you lil ass down and shut up..."

Dee-Dee Sheridan
10-27-2003, 04:12 PM
Originally posted by BHouse:
I ain't been back to church since being kicked out for laughing and eating penny candy in Sunday School... The teacher pulled me in the hallway. Snatched me by my collar, making my snap on tie come off and tell me "You better sit you lil ass down and shut up..." It was probably somebody from the Mother's Board they don't play. graemlins/rofl.gif

shannoneileen
10-27-2003, 04:12 PM
Originally posted by BHouse:
I ain't been back to church since being kicked out for laughing and eating penny candy in Sunday School... The teacher pulled me in the hallway. Snatched me by my collar, making my snap on tie come off and tell me "You better sit you lil ass down and shut up..." lmao.... ooooooh... no she didn't!!! lol

BHouse
10-27-2003, 04:14 PM
It was a dude that looked like LEMONT from Sanford and Son... graemlins/mecry.gif

[ October 27, 2003, 04:15 PM: Message edited by: BHouse ]

Dee-Dee Sheridan
10-27-2003, 04:15 PM
Originally posted by BHouse:
It was a dude... graemlins/mecry.gif Hahahaha LMAO icon_rofl.gif

Dee-Dee Sheridan
10-27-2003, 04:16 PM
Originally posted by BHouse:
It was a dude that looked like LEMONT from Sanford and Son... graemlins/mecry.gif You stupid

shannoneileen
10-27-2003, 04:19 PM
Originally posted by Dee-Dee Sheridan:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by BHouse:
It was a dude... graemlins/mecry.gif Hahahaha LMAO icon_rofl.gif </font>[/QUOTE]CTFU!!!! damn... woo... that's funny! icon_rofl.gif

BHouse
10-27-2003, 10:52 PM
The following are actual announcements taken from church bulletins:

This afternoon there will be a meeting in the south and north ends of the church. Children will be baptised at both ends.

Tuesday at 4:00 pm there will be an ice cream social. All ladies giving milk, please come early.

Wednesday, the ladies Liturgy Society will meet. Mrs. Johnson will sing: "Put Me In My Little Bed" accompanied by the pastor.

Thurday at 5:00 pm there will be a meeting of the Little Mother's club. All those wishing to become little mothers, please meet with the minister in his study.

This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Johnson to come forward and lay an egg on the altar.

On Sunday, a special collection will be taken to defray the cost of the new carpet. All those wanting to do something on the new carpet, come forward and get a piece of paper.

The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind and they may be seen in the church basement on Friday afternooon.

A bean supper will be held Saturday evening in the church basement. Music will follow.

The rosebud on the altar this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Bleser, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Julius Delser.